Putting one foot in front of the other

When my daughter died I spent a lot of days just putting one foot in front of the other, breathing in and breathing out. I can't honestly compare my feelings now to my feelings then but I do feel that right now I'm just having to put one foot in front of the other and breathe in and breathe out. And when I think about that I think about Sarah, who is feeling both physically ill and emotionally vulnerable right now. I think about how she is doing her best to keep putting one foot in front of the other, breathing in and breathing out, trying to strong for Julius and the baby inside her. It must be very hard.

I just spent a lovely evening with Sarah, Josie, their parents (Connie and Terry) and one of thier friends. We ate spagetti and drank wine and talked and ate strawberry rhubarb pie and drank coffee and talked. We talked about our faith that humans are basically good and want to do the right thing. Unfortunately anger and resentment too often get in the way and people behave in ways that are horrendously counterproductive. But we have all had the opportunity, out of this tragedy, to see people behaving in very positive ways.

I have been having the very interesting experience of asking people for money. I have learned over the past week just to walk up to people and boldly ask them to give me money to help the Were family to safety. If I find myself hesitating I just say to myself "What's the worst thing that can happen?" I realize that the worst thing that can happen is that they can say "No." But I am no worse off...and my envelope of money I am collecting is no smaller...than before I asked. One of the joys is that a number of people who have given me money...from $5 to $200...have thanked me for giving them a way to help. They appreciate having the opportunity to do something other than wring their hands and feel sorry. One friend, who is having lots of physical health problems right now, told me the appreciated the opportunity to put things in perspective. God bless them all. It has been a blessing to me to be able to feel like I am actually doing something.

But I don't want to overlook the help that comes from those who don't have the financial resources to give money but who have prayed for my friends. People who are friends of friends have been on their knees praying daily for this dire situation to settle down and for my friends to be safe. Friends of friends praying for friends of friends. Wow! It really is incredible. But actually, I think the "personalization" of this crisis that has caused people who know Andy who knows me who knows Emmanuel and Juliana to actually pay close attention to events that they might have barely noticed in passing. It has caused people in Arkansas who know Susanne and Betty who know me who knows the Were children to pray in a personal way for people they would never have even known to think about before. I believe that is the way the world will eventually come closer together. We will become real humans to one another...not just televised images. And maybe that will help to lessen man's inhumanity to man.